I don’t think I actually SERIOUSLY considered it. I mean, I’ve had my times of being utterly depressed and I wished I could get away from where I am, but I don’t think I ever really wanted to end my own life. But, I am happy with where I am right now because even through all of the hard times I have grown and become an amazing person with amazing people in my life!
Hmmm. This is actually very tough. I am in no way religious. At all. I don’t believe in God. I’m not actually sure what I believe yet, I’m still trying to figure it out. What I do not like, however, is when people try to push their religion on me, or any religion for that matter. I want to figure this stuff out for myself, thank you. I hate when people look down upon others because they have a different (or no) religion. I also hate the hypocrisy that comes with a lot of religious groups. I can’t deal with it. I do think it’s cool that people have different beliefs though!
My life right now is a HOT mess. My moms cousin is living with us and he is SO fucking loud, I can’t deal with it. I don’t trust him, I have an inky feeling about him. The male species needs to get their shit straight. And, my job can suck on it for a bit. Male species: STOP PLAYING MIND GAMES. Seriously. Stop facebook messaging me but not replying if I ask why you don’t text me. Stop flirting with me at work if you don’t like me. Stop knowing if something is wrong when I don’t even tell anyone if something is wrong. Stop calling me at work because you know EXACTLY what phone I am standing next to. Just stop all of it if you still have a gf. I can’t deal with the heartache. If you can’t text me because you have a crazy ass gf and you share a line so you don’t want her to find out, JUST TELL ME. I am understanding, really. Just grow a pair and tell me. Oh, look at me being hypocritical because I am not telling you all this I’m just ranting about it on Tumblr. Whatever. Just stop. Also, stop being attractive so I can ignore you like I want to. I keep having these awesome plans where I ignore the absolute shit out of you, but then you say hi. fuck. And work, stop being the reason for all of this. If it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t have to deal with this. Also, cut the shit. Because of work I feel like EVERYTHING I do lately is wrong. Because I’ve been there only a year and a half and I already work as a supervisor and every fucking dept does NOT give people a right to give me shit and treat me like I am inferior. I don’t give a fuck if you have been there for 10 years and are a Lead of your dept, I am still a great worker. I still work my ass off. Shit, I do more than some of them do. Fuck, I DO THEIR JOBS. Also, If we don’t make our fucking credit goals it is NOT all my fault, we have 153 fucking associates, they can contribute too. Also, STOP HAVING AN UGLY GF. Please, stop acting like I didn’t call you out on some of the shit. can’t be ugly AND psychotic, it makes me feel super more shitty about myself.
They don’t bother me. If someone wants to fuck up their own life then so be it, just don’t pressure me to do it. I drink. Of course I drink, I’m 20, in college, and I work retail. If I didn’t drink I’d probably go insane. I have tried weed on a few occasions but it doesn’t appeal to me. Although, I do really like the smell of weed, I don’t know why. Ha ha. But yeah, if a consenting adult wants to do any drugs that they want it is their business, they can fuck their shit up as long as it doesn’t involve me or a child. However, if a close friend or family member of mine was fucking up their life by doing drugs I would probably have to say/do something because I love my friends and family more than anything.
On December 6th 2021, I would like to be sitting at home looking after my young child (probably under 3 years old) while carrying my next bundle of joy. No, seriously. I want to be married and starting a family in the next ten years. I also want to have my degree in Criminal Justice. I want to start my “big girl job” as an LP in my company within the next year. I eventually want to get married and have kids. When I start having kids I WILL become a stay-at-home mom. I think it’s the most important thing in a child’s life to have their parents involved in their lives. I want to be there in every way possible. But, who knows, for I am no Sybill Trelawney!
I am shorter than 5’4. I think I’m ugly sometimes. I tan easily. I have a bad memory. I wish my hair was a different color. I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color. I have/had braces.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger. I have more than 2 piercings. I have piercing in places besides my ears. I have freckles. I’ve been kicked out of the house. I have a sibling less than six year old. I want to have kids someday. I’m in school. I have a job. I’ve fallen asleep at work/school. I almost always do/did my homework. I drift off a lot. I have big dreams. I’ve missed a week or more of school.
I failed more than 1 class last year. I’ve slipped out a “lol” in a spoken conversation. Disney movies still make me cry. I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried. I think of stupid things to do. I was born with a disease/impairment. I’ve gotten stitches/staples. I’ve broken a bone I’ve had my tonsils removed. I’ve sat in a doctor’s office/emergency room with a friend. I’ve gotten a ride with someone I don’t know. I’ve been on a plane. I’ve wished on a shooting star. I’ve seen a meteor shower.
I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas. I’ve been to a casino. I’ve been skydiving. I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
I’ve gone skinny dipping. I’ve drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour. I’ve had dry rum shots. I’ve been skiing. I’ve been in a play. I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue. I’ve seen the Northern lights. I’ve sat on a roof top at night. I’ve played chicken fight. I’ve played a prank on someone. I’ve ridden in a taxi. People have only liked me cause of my looks. I’ve been used a lot. I’ve gone on a blind date. I’ve used someone else.
I’ve broken someone’s heart. I miss someone right now. I know someone who has committed suicide. I have a fear of abandonment. I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t. I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did. I’ve had a crush on a teacher/coach. I am a cuddler. I’ve kissed a boy. I’ve kissed a girl. I’ve kissed more than one girl. I’ve been kissed in the rain. I’ve hugged a stranger. I have kissed a stranger. I’ve been called a slut. I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t. I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t. I’ve snuck out of my house. I am keeping a secret from the world. I’ve cheated on a test. I’ve been suspended from school. I’ve witnessed a crime.
I’ve been arrested.
I’ve helped a friend who has passed out from alcohol. I regularly smoke cigarettes. I’ve tried smoking cigarettes. I’ve taken painkillers when I didn’t need them. I’ve eaten shrooms. I’ve popped E. I’ve inhaled Nitrous. I’ve done hard drugs. I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem. I have at one stage in my life been diagnosed with depression. I have been diagnosed with one or more anxiety disorder. I shut others out when I’m depressed. I take anti-depressants. I’ve slept an entire day when I didn’t need it. I’ve hurt myself on purpose.
I’ve woken up crying. I’m afraid of dying. I hate funerals. I miss someone who I know isn’t coming back. I’ve seen someone dying. Someone close to me has committed suicide. I’ve planned my own suicide. I’ve attempted suicide. I’ve written a eulogy for myself. I own an iPod or MP3 player. I regret a lot of things I’ve done in my lifetime.
Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is:
Single. Yeah, single. The single life is the best thing and the worst thing. All of my friends are in some sort of relationship and I am the single one. I have no cute stories to tell my friends about my cute bf. I am the odd one out. However, I can dress like a bum and not give a fuck. I could look hot as fuck and flirt with any guy I want. I can talk about all of the hot guys that I see and talk about the guys that I am interested in and contemplate which one I should go after. That being said, the guy I currently have interest in needs to grow a pair. Real fast, real big.
Me, behave? Seriously? As a child I saw Tarzan almost naked, Cindrella arrived home after midnight, Pinocchio told lies, Aladdin was a thief, Batman drove over 200 miles an hour, Snow White lived in a house with 7 men, Popeye smoked a pipe and had tattoos, Pac Man ran around to digital music while popping pills to enchance his perfromance, and Shaggy and Scooby were mystery solving hippies that always had the munchies. The fault is not mine! If you had this childhood and LOVED it, reblog this.
so I kind of had it out with my mom today. :( I feel like no one respects me as an adult in my house. I have always had so many rules. I literally grew up in a box. My friends constantly joke with me about it, but it’s absolutely true. I have a curfew of midnight while I go to school and work full time. SO basically I have no time to see my boyfriend. And, I’m not allowed to spend the night with him. I am however allowed to move in with him because they can’t say shit about me moving out because I am twenty. Yes. it is a perplexing situation. So I have to have rules to control my life but if I wanted to move out I could. instead of treating me with respect to do what I want while still overseeing my decisions, my parents would rather me move out and do what I want with no one to fall back on?
IF YOU WANT SOMETHING DONE “YOUR WAY” FUCKING DO IT YOURSELF.
don’t bitch at me because i didn’t clean the way you like it. fuck it. also, don’t tell me the floor is part of the bathroom and what I have to clean if the floor isn’t part of the fucking kitchen so my sister doesn’t have to do it. fuck.
So I recently took myself off of my moms phone plan and got my own. Instead of having my mom pay for a phone line that she cannot afford, I decided to be a big girl and pay for my own phone. I pay $60 a month for a BlackBerry which includes the entire data plan and unlimited text and calling. Yes, I splurged a bit in getting a BlackBerry, but hey I’m a 20 year old girl: I do these things. Well, getting to the point of this rant, I went to go check something on the internet for my dad on my phone and he started to freak out on me saying I don’t have internet. I calmly told him that I have my own phone line so I can go on the internet. He gave me an attitude and said I only got my own phone so I can throw away money. I’m making it fucking easier for them by not having them pay for my phone line and he’s getting pissy with me. Wtf, I’m trying to be an adult and be helpful and this is what I get. AWESOME!